Habits - The magical way to be aWesomE!
What gets you out of bed in the morning?
The alarm? The dog? Kids? $1000 ( I think that was an 80’s supermodel actually)…do you snooze till the last minute before getting up and racing through the motions to get to work on time, or the family up and ready. Then what do you do on the weekend? Stuff the alarm? You were thinking it would be good to get a morning walk in the sunshine before breakfast, butttttttt its so cosy…….zzzzzz you sleep in…ahhhhhh
What do you do at night after dinner? Is that when the munchies set in? That mindless time when you weren’t going to eat the biscuits or chocolate tonight….buuuutttt….argh…I need it…or your brain conveniently fuzzes over any logic about weight-loss and suddenly the block of chocolate or biscuits or, insert “food” here, are all gone. Damn! you think, I’ll resist tomorrow night.
All these are habits.
The thing that makes us get out of bed, brush our teeth, or not, exercise , or not, binge on facebook, or not (is there anyone out there that can actually resist that magnetic pull to check your posts likes?, sigh)
Habits rule our lives.
We talk a certain way, we say please, thankyou…or we don’t!, we always put salt on our food at night without thinking, we put shoes on right foot first, we get home and put the tv, or heater on, or something else all without thinking. We may kiss our spouse/ kids/ dogs when we leave for work, or we may always forget.
All habits.
The habits make us what and who we are.
So who are you?
I think one of the only things I heard Dr Phil say that I actually benefited from, was when he counselled a couple that every interaction, no matter what, either benefits your relationship, or it doesn’t. I liked that.
If you think about it, every single thing we say or do has an impact. Positive or negative. It impacts us, impacts people at work, home, strangers, pets, plants…..everything… either positively or its negatively……its never neutral….is it? I found a lot of value in that way of thinking…. Although I don’t remember it as often as I should to help guide me to more positive interactions…its not a habit yet (doh!)…but when I DO, I feel empowered and ready to improve my life.
You may think its selfish to focus on yourself like this…I hope not, but improving your life is the most important thing you can do and focusing on you and your habits are the magical key to enable your dreams to come true.
Imagine yourself at your very best, your most happiest…...
……what would that look like? How would you feel? How would you act? How would everyone else around you act and feel? Its the ripple effect…everyone, everything is a part of this cycle. You're happy, everyone is happy
I’ve gone a little philosophical…okay…quite philosophical…..this was meant to be just about making good habits and getting healthier and fitter….but really, those things are just one inevitable part of the rewards/ benefits of having a series of good, productive habits.
Lets try something
It won’t take long I promise
Okay so you know what a happy, productive YOU looks like (doesn’t matter if its vague, don’t judge)….. Note that down.`What things do you need to do to achieve it or at lest some of it. List those down as well. Like a 20 km run, finish a course, increase typing speed, learn to cook great Indian dishes, etc.
Now write two lists. One is the habits that you feel are of benefit to you and the goals, and the other, a list of habits that do not benefit you or the goals.
Some of you are happily trotting off with pencil and paper/ iPad/ mud and stick in hand doing this, and I know others are thinking “urgh…I know it already, no point writing it down”
YES there IS
Just do it (thankyou Nike)…. The most common thing I hear from people who fail to make a change is, “I know what to do, I’ll just do that”…. I’ve never met anyone yet, myself included, that that has worked for.
So humour me….please….I’ll even humour you and write mine down…. (Yes..I was thinking nahhh, I know already, why bother…this is for others)….hmm…hello pot…the kettle is boiling….
If you find it a little tricky to think of positive and negative habits you do, or if you really want to go deep with work on yourself, ask a work mate, family member, friend or coach, what they would put in those columns for you. You get fantastic insights this way.
Right.
Now pick one of those negative ones. Don’t try more than one. Some people can multi-change, but really, its harder than you think.
So for this example, I’ve picked my snacking one…now thats pretty hard for me, trust me! I know if I didn’t snack after dinner I would definitely be a few kilos lighter in fat, absolutely no doubt…..and the body weight thing and health is a concern for me. This is something I know I do that is not the best for me and yet haven't I managed to change it…ever…I know what to do…….and I’ve adjusted for a few weeks/ days/ months at a time…and yet I still head back there.
So I’ve picked that. Now I start thinking of some ways to change it to the ultimate….NO EATING AFTER DINNER (please note, this is not just a vanity goal, this is also a very healthy habit to acquire that has a ream of health benefits from mitochondria health, insulin sensitivity, good nights sleep, more serotonin production…I could go on)
Here I have:
- Snacking non stop after dinner with pretzels, crackers, choc drink etc
- NO eating after dinner
Next the goal now is to fill in the blanks. Give an easy path to the end goal. Make those links the babiest of steps. IMPORTANT, don’t question it, just make them the smallest of steps, each logically progressing slightly from the other. Mine now looks like:
- Snacking non stop after dinner with pretzels, crackers, choc drink etc
- Snacking non stop with just the choc drink (why? Its low calorie and in my case it helps me feel full and I find the crackers really call to me, so they are the hardest thing to stop)
- Non Stop with the choc drink but with a cup of hot water and lemon juice before hand (herbal tea just doesn’t motivate me…feels to hard to make at that time of night. The lemon helps my insulin sensitivity and it makes me pause for a moment before diving into the choc drink)
- Same as above, but I make another hot water lemon drink to have while I’m having my choc drink
- Now I will either stop the choc drink half an hour before bed OR I will finish with the hot water and lemon
- Now I will limit my choc drinks to one less than I was having
- I will continue in this fashion till the below happens
NO eating after dinner
I know me…..the above should work. They are logical easy steps that I apply for one week each at least and only move ahead to the next when I feel confident.
There will be evenings when I feel completely lost and inadequate to not eat but with my list above, already written out, I will make my unreasonable mind look at it and go up the list till I reach the one that I can actually do at that time.
So even a ‘bad night’ is still a win. I won’t plague myself the next day and the next night I should be able to hop straight back to the level I was at previously. If not, I go to the level I can manage that night and probably sit there for a week before progressing again.
A year from now……eating after dinner when I don’t need it, out the window, gone! I’ll be a able to have the occasional dessert night without then sliding back into my old habit of NEEDING to eat and eat after dinner. I will be the one IN CONTROL of that.
Seriously….think about it….
How empowering!
Have you made your list?
Look at it
How can you fail?
You can’t.
Yes discipline IS involved, however, you have taken into account your ups and downs, your mood swings, good days and bad. Put that list out there, put it on the fridge. See it everyday. When you are motivated and positive you will NOT need to have it there…fantastic! Awesome!
BUT
You KNOW you will need it at some stage. Thats the way it works. Until something is second nature, and this takes about a month, (a month per step is ideal, but I know you want results faster than that) you will almost definitely fail.
This is why most diets don’t work
Why most plans don’t work
We all have the best of intentions, but we must plan the through the failing times, else thats what we will do. Better still, we do it with baby steps so its actually PAINLESS and pretty STRESSFREE :-)
I have set so many goals in the past, and failed most of them, for this very reason of not planning properly. I’m sure I’m not alone.
So give it a go and let me know what happens, what you achieved, even if its small. Like doing the dishes before bed, or making the bed on rising. Whatever….its all a win
You KNOW you will be happier
Because
…..You will become the person you want to be, the person you know you CAN be.
Go out and conquer!
A shameless plug for my services now
The above is how I prefer to coach. I can help you set the most productive ones for your health and fitness goals. I can help you stick to them and be accountable. Imagine yourself one year from now if you started those changes today
Seriously
IMAGINE
How awesome would you be!
My answer is, VERY
Comfort Zones
What was the last thing you did or didn’t do because it made you feel uncomfortable?
Morning jog in the rain? Or did you just skip it that day?
Faced hunger for half a day? Or thought about it and didn’t?
Spoke in front of a group of people? Or opted out ?
One thing I have always conversely tried to do and tried to avoid…especially the older I get.. is getting out of my comfort zone.
I resist it, although,
I KNOW its important to do it
I KNOW the challenge is great for resilience, experience, character development….and, quite frankly, if we don’t get out of it semi regularly, life is pretty beige.
(On a brain health note, it also activates certain pathways that is very very healthy in the brain. We don’t want those atrophying.)
However
Its nice to say its good for you, but its often another to do it. I’m a classic for excuses, are you?
My latest challenge was going to a concert. To clarify, going to a Pink concert.
Half of you are now saying, “what!…what kind of challenge is that!?…give me that damn ticket!”
…and I suspect, there a few out there who read the above and immediately knew what a challenge it was.
Everything in life is pretty subjective, whats hard for one is easy for another. I try to keep that in mind when I want to criticise others. For me, going to a concert is tricky on many levels.
I don’t like crowds, they make me edgy
- I don’t like loud noises
- I like early nights, and this wouldn’t be one
- I like to workout and eat healthy and the ramifications of a late night means I will want to eat more than normal and be too tired to exercise.
- I got up the concert morning for work at 4.20am…big day!
- Driving there and back in the concert traffic, trying to find a park that isn’t a marathon away and in a safe enough zone.
I could so easily have not gone, give me a choice and I would have stayed home all warm and cosy….but I knew …I KNOW…. That I would feel soooo much better if I went. Like when you are due for a workout and thats the last thing you want to do BUT you KNOW its good for you and you’ll be happy after. When you want a yummy snack, and theres only apples left in the house, and ermmm…noooooo it just won’t do! (First world problems hey!)
Fortunately, and I am so very fortunate, my wonderful partner is the exact opposite. He likes filling the days with experiences and friends, and he works damn hard on top of that. He constantly challenges my zones, happily and unmercifully challenges them, and thank goodness. I would be living so beige without that.
SO, I made sure not to think about the concert all day and just potter through my daily schedule of work, exercise and dogs. Much more relaxed…. I think I’ll try that next time too hmmmm
Well, what a concert! We were entertained fully! I’ve never seen a show like it. This woman is absolutely amazing.
There was also a side thought hovering throughout the concert.
I had treated my daughters to tickets to the show (birthday gift a few months before) on another date a few days after our show. Those that know my story know I unfortunately have been forced to disconnect from them (I look forward to that being reversed one day *quick prayer*). My joy in getting communication with them when they received the tickets was huge, but sadly since then I have heard nothing and minimal to no response from messages. Its normal, but it always hurts. So this was at the back of my mind during the concert. I was thinking how wonderful an experience it will be for them to see this incredible show which is also chock a block full of female empowerment, glamour, awesomeness. All around were women and mums with their daughters having a lovely time. It was bitter sweet to see, but more sweet, as in a strange way it is something we will have to connect us. Our shared experience and joy in this show.
So Pink and my wonderful, crazy, fun partner, I thank you.
Another challenging situation faced and an incredible experience for my reward.
In the words of a dear person
“How lucky am I"
postscript: my daughter did msg me..... thanking my partner only. One message in 3 months. I nearly threw my lunch up. Kids can chop your soul down so easily can't they.....
Painfree? Is it possible? My experience with turmeric
This year has been a year of many firsts for me. Probably the most relevant one is the onset of peri menopause, hmmmm....trying to embrace that one, and the other is the recognition that I am suffering from arthritis, damn!
Okay, okay, I get it now. I have always tried to deal compassionately/ empathise with all of my clients, and I have been able to embrace the trials of my life (kicking and screaming sometimes) the last few years as it has made me a much better trainer and person, but I have never appreciated the pain of arthritis. My goodness! Its horrible, it keeps you awake. Mine's in my big toe and makes movement painful and often I struggled to walk because it just hurt too much. I see and feel my body compensating for the lack of movement from that side of my body and my mind races to all the repercussions that will have to my mobility if I allow myself to be pushed around by this 'thing'.
Panadol didn't cut it, voltaren, nope. I've tried MSM in the past (not for arthritis admittedly), did nothing. Being me, I thought straight to my diet. I am not that strict currently and the processed foods and alcohol would be adding a fair bit of inflammation to my body. So wrestling with myself, half of me wants medication, the other half says sternly ,"now, come on. You tell others not to complain if they feel pain and their diet is a mess. Don't be hypocritical. Suck it up and do something........Nooo drugs! now!" and so on
Then, as happens when you buy a blue car, and suddenly everyone is driving a blue car too, I happened across several information sources regarding turmeric. I have been a little dismissive of turmeric, I know the theory, buuttt eh. However, some people are having anecdotally great success with high dose turmeric, up to 30 gms a day. Cool, worth a go, its certainly not hurting me.
So for the last 3 months I've been having between 15 and 30 gms a day (Trying to cut costs a little), after a week, far less pain. 3 months later...seriously...I will not stop this. Not only is the turmeric having a wonderful anti-inflammatory effect on my brain and the rest of the body, but its pretty much painfree arthritis wise. I can feel the arthritis lump there, but I can walk normally and run , jump if I am so inclined and it doesn't pain me just putting my shoes on or having a tissue fall on it. Heaven!
Let me know if you try the high dose as well and what result it had to your pain. Full disclosure, I also have hip pain caused by me overworking my muscles and not stretching and it hasn't touched that ache so much, but Know what I need to do there....stretch damn it Vashti. Just do it!
All the best :-) x
PS - An important disclaimer! If at all unsure consult your doctor before you try extra turmeric, as I am no doctor! Also it is possible to have ill effects from too much. It will thin the blood, so if you are on blood thinners such as warfarin, please do not try this. It can lower the blood sugar so if you are on medication that lowers blood sugar be aware that this can lower it further and that can be quite dangerous.
Places to get it:
- Healthfood stores
- https://www.iherb.com/pr/Dr-Mercola-Fermented-Turmeric-60-Capsules/82238
- The one I use currently: https://www.chemistwarehouse.com.au/buy/84676/Wagner-Turmeric-3333-2b-100-Capsules